Tuesday, January 22, 2013

Tim Tebow To Auction Off Virginity

The Turnip News

New York Jets backup quarterback Tim Tebow is reportedly set to auction off his virginity to help pay his bills.

The news came yesterday after circulating rumours that the Jets organization was going to release the former Broncos starting QB. Sources close to Tebow said he’s recently been weary of his future and is unsure of how he will make money if another NFL team refuses to sign him soon.

The auction for the star’s virginity will be held in New York City early next month at an undisclosed location where a very specific guest list of rich housewives, wealthy divorcees and horny cougars will be invited to bid on Tebow’s V-Card.

Tebow’s publicist Donald Matheison said his client is excited but also nervous for having his body prostituted to a stranger for money. “He’s got the jitters, for sure!,” said Matheison, who is expecting to generate a big price tag for sex with the NFLer. “I’m hoping there are a lot of women out there who have fantasies of taking an athlete’s virginity. But they gotta pay first…” he added.

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