The Turnip News
HOLLYWOOD - In a shocking, public confession that appears to contradict many happy years of healthy marriage, Bobby Brown confirmed to reporters yesterday that he has traded his wife, Whitney, to Ike Turner in exchange for Ike’s current wife, Tina.
Both men held a press conference late yesterday afternoon to discuss the swap, along with both newly acquired spouses, who were not permitted to speak at any time during the entirety of the event. “Yes it’s true,” declared Bobby, side-by-side with newly possessed Tina, now his wife.
“Tina is mah bitch now. She gon do whateva I say, wheneva I say it,” emphasized Bobby to the crowd. Stepping in to give his two-sense was newly-Whitney-wed Ike Turner, now in sole possession of the Grammy-award-winning singer.
“Whitney is mine now and I couldn’t be happier… I’m thirsty, I need a draaank!,” stated Ike to nobody in particular. He then addressed Whitney directly and said “Bitch! I’m talkin’ to you! Go fetch me some Covasier, hoe!”. It’s unsure whether the new couples plan to socialize together after the merger, but sources close to Bobby and Ike claim “pimpin ain’t easy, but it’s necessaaary”.
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HOLLYWOOD - In a shocking, public confession that appears to contradict many happy years of healthy marriage, Bobby Brown confirmed to reporters yesterday that he has traded his wife, Whitney, to Ike Turner in exchange for Ike’s current wife, Tina.
Both men held a press conference late yesterday afternoon to discuss the swap, along with both newly acquired spouses, who were not permitted to speak at any time during the entirety of the event. “Yes it’s true,” declared Bobby, side-by-side with newly possessed Tina, now his wife.
“Tina is mah bitch now. She gon do whateva I say, wheneva I say it,” emphasized Bobby to the crowd. Stepping in to give his two-sense was newly-Whitney-wed Ike Turner, now in sole possession of the Grammy-award-winning singer.
“Whitney is mine now and I couldn’t be happier… I’m thirsty, I need a draaank!,” stated Ike to nobody in particular. He then addressed Whitney directly and said “Bitch! I’m talkin’ to you! Go fetch me some Covasier, hoe!”. It’s unsure whether the new couples plan to socialize together after the merger, but sources close to Bobby and Ike claim “pimpin ain’t easy, but it’s necessaaary”.
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